PRIME MOVERS – Being Driven

Welcome back Viphilus*

OK, let's jump right in to talking about being driven.

Abraham Maslow was an American psychologist, best known for creating the “hierarchy of needs” for human beings in 1943: a pyramid structure that had 5 ascending levels he labelled physiological, safety, love (belonging), esteem and self-actualization. He later modified the hierarchy (along with others who tweaked it) to include 8 levels in total.

The first thing I noted was the logical progression in Maslow’s hierarchy from physical, through emotional and mental to spiritual. In my own reading of the literature, coupled with my strong belief in the role that the deepest spiritual needs are as real as the other needs, I added an additional 2 levels at the top (and 1 more categorical level that I call “deep spiritual”).  In the graphic here you’ll see the 5 categorical levels as well as the double sub-levels with each category.

You’ll undoubtedly note that I've made the image into a cone-shape rather than a pyramid. This is for two reasons: 

1) I wanted to respect and preserve the original work for what Maslow, and others had in mind ... so the pyramid shape is still evident;

2) by accentuating the conical shape it allows a viewing from above which allows me to discuss this subject from what I feel is a better perspective … that of concentric rings.

I’m going to refer to this image over the next few weeks. For today, I want to focus on the things that DRIVE us.

If you recall, last week I referred to DRIVE as the thing that moves us to acquire (to get) more … or to acquire better. As I define it, we are “driven” to obtain things that we are lacking (or feel we are lacking). Linking this to our basic needs we are driven by our physical and emotional needs (and arguably, a little bit of mental needs). As Maslow originally postulated this, these particular needs are referred to as “needs of deficiency” … you don’t experience the need (you are not moved to fill the need) until you sense or experience a lacking in that particular thing/area. As long as the need is being filled, or you sense that it is being filled, you are unmoved to fill it. But the moment you sense a lacking in that area, you are “driven” to fill it. This drivenness can, at times, become intense and appear almost irrational.

Let’s make this clear by looking at the sub-levels within the categories of physical and emotional.

PHYSICAL

Level 1: Physiological -  air, food, water, sex, shelter, warmth, etc.

Level 2: Safety/Security – protection, money, law & order, limits, stability, etc.

EMOTIONAL

Level 3: Belongingness – family, affection, relationships, working groups, etc.

Level 4: Esteem – achievement, status, responsibility, reputation, etc.

ANIMAL NEEDS

Levels 1-4 (the physical and emotional ) are sometimes referred to as the “animal needs” because of the instinctual response to fill the need when it is lacking. Maslow’s original theory on how this works came under dispute, however, I don’t think he was wrong … I believe that his theory was simply incomplete. His basic notion was that a person would not be moved to fill a need if one of two conditions existed: 1) the need is already filled; 2) there remains an unmet need at a lower level.

Example # 1 – Consider your need for air. As you have been reading this you have likely been supplied with all the oxygen that you needed to live. Accordingly, you probably haven’t been giving much thought to filling your need for air. However, had something happened and all the air in the room was sucked out, you would have immediately been driven to get air … at almost any cost.

Example # 2 – Continuing with the need for air … had all the air been sucked out of the room and you were desperately trying to fill that need, I’ll hazard the guess that you probably stopped reading this fascinating blog because a Level 1 need trumps a Level 5 need (your cognitive needs to learning … we’ll touch on this one next week).

Maslow’s thinking was that this is true for all the animal needs. Using my concentric ring analogy, as long as an outer (more superficial) level need exists, it will be difficult to impossible to be motivated to fill the deeper needs. This is where we get the John Maxwell axiom, “people won’t care what you know until they first know that you care.” Translation: people won’t be motivated to want knowledge from you (level 5) until they have been first motivated by your care for them (level 3).

Where Maslow’s theories came under dispute was the reality that people routinely are motivated to do things even when their more basic animal needs remain unmet (or are threatened). The examples that are usually raised at this point include starving artists and suicide bombers. What I want to point out is that Maslow wasn't wrong … his theory just wasn't complete.

Things that DRIVE us are not bad … but they can become points of obsession and thus, create a dysfunctional lifestyle. How? If we develop an irrational sense that we don’t have a sufficient supply of Level 1-4 things, a scarcity mentality takes hold of us and we shut down our motivations that come from the deeper levels … levels where personal growth and maturity come from. Tending to only the physical and emotional needs creates a shallow life.

An over-supply of Level 1-4 needs is like the gardener who sprinkles his lawn with a bit of water every day; it promotes shallow roots. In fact, it is only through the occasionally intentional withholding or denial of water where the grass is forced to grow deeper roots in search of water. The end result is a much healthier and more resilient plant.

I want to stress that there’s nothing wrong with meeting our basic needs … physiological … safety and security … belongingness … esteem. Just don’t forget about intentionally seeking to fill the deeper needs where your mind and spirit are developed. We’ll get to those in the next couple of weeks.

FEAR

Have you ever thought about what fear is and where it comes from? Fear is essentially the emotional outcome of the belief that one of your basic human needs is not being met … or won’t be met … or will be thwarted in some way. The threat doesn't even have to be real … it can be imaginary or simply perceived. Fear can be nothing more than a state of mind, but it is driven by the threat of an unmet need, generally in levels 1-4.

Each year a list is published of the greatest human fears. Year after year the top 10 on the list shuffles around a bit, but for decades now, the number 1 & 2 spots have remained pretty much as number 1 & 2. Number 2 is death. Number 1 is public speaking. Jerry Seinfeld’s response to this was hilarious. He said, “that means that if you are at a funeral, you would rather be the guy in the casket than they guy giving the eulogy.”

Now this is crazy right? Or is it? Let’s dig a bit deeper. The public speaking phobia is essentially the belief that a level 4 need is not going to be met (the esteem need). The fear of death is a belief that a level 1 need is not going to be met. Now I doubt for a second that if someone put a gun to the head of a person who was terrified to speak in public that the person would say, “go ahead, pull the trigger.” When it came down to it, adrenaline would lead the person to mutter some words to the crowd rather than being shot. So what’s going on with the fear? I think that while we imagine all sorts of terrible things that can happen to us, the ones that are most likely to grab hold of us are the ones that we have already experienced in one form or another. Embarrassment (or shame) is something everyone has experienced; the sensations are strong, the loss of esteem is keenly felt. But ... and I think that this is the key ... it is close to the deepest level need that can feel threatened just by thinking about it. This may become more apparent when we dig into the deeper levels in the next couple of weeks. 

Meanwhile, ponder that as it relates to your own sense of being driven. As I look around I get the sense that the majority of people are overly driven to please others ... to look good in the minds of others ... to control how others think about them. For many (most?) this may be the greatest motivational driver in their life. The simplest (pithiest) thing I can say to help you put that in perspective is what I learned from my Mom who told the teenage-me, "you wouldn't worry so much about what other people thought of you if you realized just how little they did." (what she was really saying was, "my son - don't flatter yourself - nobody's thinking about you.")

Being driven is a reality that all of us experience. But there are better (deeper) motivations such as inspiration and passion which help us to grow and move away from self-limiting, self-defeating and self-destructive lives. Let's learn about these together.

I hope to see you back next Monday.

Blessings Viphilus,

Your friend, Omega Man

OCA Training

* Viphilus means, "lover of life"